Heard on Twitter

TWEETS THAT MAKE YOU THINK
JenatTheCuteKid: Hello and goodmorning tweeps! I fear 7-11 is spying on us, they had McCain and Obama cups, creative way to find out who is impacting where!

KatjaPresnal: Mom at school yard “she’s 2, I’m not gonna miss this age” me thinking “yes you will”

johnreese: Only in the USA could half the country accuse a guy of being racist because he referred to someone as “That One” (give me a break)

relocatedyank: i have one prejudice… stupid people… and not people with disabilities.. those who just need to get a freakin’ clue..

DebNg: Took my son out to lunch to reward him for being the awesomest kid ever.

DebNg: @singlewahm Kids are funny. But they’re so cool. Don’t want to think about what life would be like without my son.

TWEETS THAT MAKE YOUR MOUTH WATER
busymommaval: coming home to make freshly smoked, salmon chowder! for the family of course since I can’t have dairy, arghh, now I feel need to run lol

busymommaval: sorry, no recipe Potatoes (red preferable), onion, smoked salmon, seasonings, water or chicken broth and then NF1/2 & cornstarch

MommyJenna: Honey Lemon Pepper Chicken…Yummy

TWEETS THAT MAKE YOU LAUGH
JackBastide: Have you ever gotten an @ reply from somebody HOURS later and you don’t knwo what they are replying to? .. they need to fix that

minnemom: So . . . last night the banana won out over the ice cream. That’s not happening two nights in a row!

akaMonty: Sex is not the answer. SEX is the question, and “YES!” is the answer.

AprilTara: Wow. First time I’ve taken Benadryl in a while…forgot how fuzzy it makes me feel. Weeee! lol

momsatwork: Co-worker keeps commenting that he smells cat urine. I fear it’s my new perfume.

thedomesticdiva: my pc tried to die again this morning…..not cool pc, not cool.

eMom: Dear Twitter, please warn me the next time you decide to take away my DM archives. :'(

latarahamying: LOL..my butt and my hips tell ya how much i am into sweets; especially cheesecake and peach cobbler

jennydecki: Twitter is not a big IM conversation, it is not microblogging, it is a big ass chat room. Welcome back to IRC everybody! LOL

chele: Good news! After performing a labotomy thru my eye socket and flooding my eye with rewetting drops… I found my contact lens on my desk.

relocatedyank: perhaps if i paid attention at pta meetings, i could’ve saved myself some money on those stupid dating sites

KristineMcK: hiding from mail man so he doesn’t ask me questions about the stock market (he cornered me last week, not falling for it this time!)

Akula: I love the sweet sound of Outlook grabbing emails before they hit my inbox and strangling them to death without a trace.

davehuth: sweet christmas i never thought of it before but the Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater nursery rhyme is WHACK! i refuse to read it to my kid anymore

TWEETS THAT MAKE YOU TEAR UP A LITTLE (or at least they made me)
AprilTara: Wow. Just got a text from Sissy saying “I love you. I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you through. I hope I’m half the mom you are.”